A skill too often overlooked by new managers
Stepping into a management role can be an intimidating transition.
When I was promoted to the position of training manager with little prior experience leading others, I felt utterly unprepared. While strong individual skills are crucial, the shift to empowering a team requires adopting a whole new mindset. And in my journey, one ability has proven most impactful—listening.
Really listening.
When we find ourselves suddenly responsible for others, it’s natural to want to prove ourselves by acting like we have all the answers. But the reality, as any seasoned mentor will stress, is that no individual can possibly know everything. That’s why communication with direct reports is so important.
Yet listening, truly listening, is often the aspect of leadership most overlooked.
Why Listening Should be Your Number One Focus
As a new manager, I quickly discovered that making assumptions without understanding full contexts usually backfires.
Early on, I faced a conflict between two employees that I failed to prevent due to miscommunication. Both reported the same incident very differently to me, and tensions rose as I struggled to sort facts from opinions.
Only after sitting down with each person separately and devoting my full attention to their perspectives did the root causes become clear.
A simple misinterpretation of words had escalated needlessly due to neither feeling validated. Had I listened without prejudice from the outset, the non-issue could have been defused promptly.
That experience taught me that gaining buy-in and cooperation requires seeing an issue from multiple viewpoints.
As a new manager, you need to acknowledge that you don’t automatically understand everything, and you should encourage dialogue with your staff to bridge any knowledge gaps. By listening without defensiveness or preconceptions, you earn trust as an impartial judge.
Once you have gained trust, people will bring their concerns directly to you rather than avoid a difficult discussion later on.
Active Listening Techniques to Hone Your Skills
So how exactly do you listen well? As with any skill, it takes practise.
Here are some techniques I’ve adopted:
Paraphrasing: After someone shares, reflect back what you understand in your own words. This confirms comprehension without assumptions, like
“What I’m gathering is that the new software launch caused unintentional delays. Is that accurate?”
Clarifying Questions: Ask follow-ups to gain full context, avoiding rushed conclusions.
“Could you provide an example of how customers reacted when delays occurred?”
This nourishes understanding versus quick fixes.
Observing Nonverbals: Take note of body language and tone in addition to words. A dismissive gesture may contradict a polite response. Frustration might underlie calm speech.
Paying attention to multiple communication channels enhances insight.
Listening with these habits prevents us from filling in blanks prematurely. It demonstrates respect for another’s perspective rather than predetermining responses.
Personalising Your Approach Based on Diverse Personalities
Employees find inspiration through various avenues.
By listening, you discern how to best relate to an individual. For example, as an introvert myself, I appreciate a manager who allows solo processing time before discussions to feel prepared.
Meanwhile, an extroverted colleague thrives in an open, back-and-forth dialogue.
Left to ponder alone too long, they risk losing focus, but they throw around collaborative ideas eagerly. Recognising these differences helps customise your approach.
For example…
Jim, a senior employee, prefers receiving feedback privately in writing to review at his own pace.
Emily needs both praise and criticism to keep from shutting down when people are being picky.
By listening for emotional buttons and learning styles, a manager matches their method to the person for maximum productivity.
No two are alike, so a one-size-fits-all leadership style falls short.
Playing to diverse strengths sustains high morale.
Check Your Ego at the Door
Effective managers empower others instead of promoting empty platitudes about themselves.
Effective listening demands checking preconceptions and accepting you may not have all the solutions. As a new manager, focus on:
- Soliciting ideas from everyone, not just extroverted “yes men/women” who eagerly agree.
- Admitting what you don’t know invites shared learning, rather than pretending to know everything alone.
This fosters mutual accountability beyond an autocratic rule from above.
People respect a manager who is humble enough to see others as knowledgeable colleagues, not cogs to direct.
Strengthening Your Muscles Through Daily Practise
Perfecting any ability necessitates consistent effort over time.
To strengthen my listening skills, I challenged myself to full engagement without distractions during biweekly one-on-ones. The insights steadily improved my understanding beyond surface issues.
Previously overlooked concerns surfaced just by making space for undivided attention.
Subtle personality cues emerged, helping me tailor my approach. Incremental improvements reduced assumptions and fostered empathy for diverse experiences.
Most rewardingly, individuals grew comfortable raising delicate topics without fear of repercussion or rushed dismissal.
They knew their manager was there first to comprehend, then support.
This daily practise remains my method for ongoing growth.
By starting each interaction focused on hearing others fully, I’ve forged stronger bonds, enabling my team to thrive at their best. The results reaffirm listening’s core importance for any manager seeking to empower exceptional work.
In closing, honing receptive communication skills takes dedication…
…But by making listening your number one focus from day one as a new manager, you lay the groundwork for understanding, trust and collaboration like no other quality can.
The rewards of a cohesive, productive team will astonish you.
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